One of my biggest problems is the blur. The blur is something that I define as a period of foggy living where life makes great strides in time and I missed it. There are moments that I am able to get so harnessed in that I can see it with high def vision. There will be times of Crystal clear moments and absolute clarity in sound, but then, “poof” I am shot into the future without experiencing the past. This is a major indication of not abiding. When I realized that I missed out on the experience of the past, I realized that I was not abiding in those moments.
I have been able to see that one of the major components that makes up my blurs is the fact that it very hard to focus for long period of time, for that matter, short amount of times, as well. It is a challenge to slow myself down to really see what is going on around me. This is not the type of living that I enjoy. I want to partake of this life, not skip through it for periods of time. There is something always to see, always to hear. I want the high def vision that brings life clearly into focus. When I am able to do this I have realized some things that I do differently than I do if life is cruising by. Now that I see some practical ways to abide (remain in the present to see and hear and experience everything in the now) I would like to share some of them. The biggest part of abiding is the voice of God. When I am in the now I can hear His voice with total clarity. This is not the case when I am engulfed in the blur. So when I realize that THE Voice is gone I retreat to my solitary place. Usually when I get there I have to try and stop the madness in my mind and really try and listen. An exercise that I use is I listen very closely to all of the noises around me. It starts as a jumbled mass of sounds but as I listen I can hear the individual parts that are making it up, as I listen, my hearing begins to become more acute. After a while I am able to begin to make my way into His presence and with all acuity hear His voice.
Another part of abiding is the ability to see what is really around me. Again when I get to my solitary place my mind is bouncing all over the place and I cannot really see what is around me. I gain control I slowly begin to look and see everything that is around me. I begin to name it as I see it. I do not over spiritualize it, I only name what I see, not what is inside of it. I notice the movements and how they move, the colors, the positioning, the shadows, and so on. Once I am able to see everything I look to the skies. (during this exercise I am always asking for help seeing everything) As I focus on the skies it sometimes tricky to get the eyes to cooperate so I came up this exercise that sometimes helps. I find for stars that make a square and then within that square I begin to count the stars. This will typically bring to focus everything and I am able to really see how many stars are there and from there I am able to look around and really see what is going on around me.
After these times I am able to go back into the world and live as I want to. I am able to stay in the present for longer periods of time. I hear what is going on, I see all of the sights. I am able to really help those around me instead of missing what they need. This is the type of life that I am progressing towards. Living in the now. Hopefully this will help anyone that struggles with the blurs as well. If anyone would like additional info, feel free to ask.
